Peppino bought a new hat and Tito asked what day he bought it. Peppino replied, “If yesterday was tomorrow, today would be Tuesday.” On what day did Peppino buy his hat?
I’m a five letter word. Remove my last two letters and I’m a synonym of drag. My second and third letters form an exclamation and my first and second letters are a homophone with a number. What am I?
Towel. Tow is a synonym of drag, ow is an exclamation when you’re hurt (and far more appropriate in mixed company than the four-letter alternatives) and to is a homophone of two.
Brandon was walking around at the carnival. A man called out from a booth and said, “If I can write your exact weight on this piece of paper, you have to pay me $50. If I can’t do it, I’ll pay you $50.”
Brandon checked the booth for a scale but saw nothing. He agreed. Since your weight can fluctuate by a pound or two, he decided that no matter what number the man wrote, he would just say he weighed a pound more or less. In the end, the man in the booth won the $50. How did he do it?
I am a wonderful help to women, The hope of something to come. I harm no citizen except my slayer. Rooted I stand on a high bed. I am shaggy below. Sometimes the beautiful peasant’s daughter, an eager-armed, Proud woman grabs my body, Rushes my red skin, holds me hard, Claims my head. The curly-haired Woman who catches me fast will feel Our meeting. Her eye will be wet.
