The Tortoise, Onion and Tomato

What is three-eighths tortoise, two-fifths onion and two-sixths tomato?

Toronto

3/8 tortoise = TOR (the first three letters)
2/5 onion = ON (the first two letters)
2/6 tomato = TO (the first two letters)

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Your Father’s Sister’s Sister-in-law

What relation would your father’s only single sister’s sister-in-law be to you?

Your mother.

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Many Foods Make Me Strong

Many foods can make me strong but give me water and I won’t last long. What am I?

Fire.

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A Foot On Each Side

What has a foot on each side and one in the middle?

A yard stick.

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Crazy Taxi Driver

A taxi driver runs through four red lights, two stop signs and goes through a house. A police officer witnesses this but doesn’t do anything. Why not?

The taxi driver is not in his cab, he’s out for a run. The house he went through was his own because he was done running.

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Swallow

You can swallow me, but I can swallow you. What am I?

Water.

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One Way I’m Feeling Normal

One way I’m feeling normal,
Another I’m extremely thin,
I could be a punishment,
Or the type who always wins.

I’m free from all impurity,
And you may have divined,
I have a keen edge,
But of course I am refined.

Fine.

The riddle refers to a variety of meanings of the word fine.

Feeling normal refers to when you feel fine.
Extremely thin refers to a fine thread.
A punishment refers to being charged a fee.
The one who wins refers to an athlete who is physically trained and hardened close to the limit of efficiency.
Free from impurity refers to measuring the fineness of precious metals.
A keen edge refers to a knife with a fine edge.
Refined refers to fine manners or elegance.

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Not Flesh, Feather, Scales Nor Bone

We are not flesh, feather, scales nor bone;
Yet we still have fingers and thumbs of our own.

What are we?

Gloves. They’re not made of flesh, feather, scales or bone, but have fingers and thumbs.

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The Best of Three Evils

A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven’t eaten in 3 months.

Which room should he choose to have the best chance of staying alive?

The third room, since the lions would have died from starvation.

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A Bottle and a Cork

A bottle and cork cost $1.10. If the bottle costs a dollar more than the cork, how much does the cork cost?

Most people guess 10 cents, but $1 more than 10 cents is $1.10, which would mean the total cost would be $1.20, not $1.10.

The correct answer is 5 cents. If the cork costs 5 cents, then the bottle costs a dollar more, or $1.05, making the total cost $1.10.

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