The Old Man’s Book

Milton shuffled slowly along the shelves browsing books. He finally walked up to the counter and handed the girl a book. She looked at the inside cover and told him it would be $3.75. Milton handed her the money and walked away without the book. The girl watched him leave empty-handed but didn’t try to stop him. Why?

Milton was a forgetful and naughty fellow. He was summoning his courage to approach the counter to return his overdue book. The kindly lass at the counter saw the book was 15 days overdue and had accrued the egregious late fee of $3.75 (25 cents a day). Lesson learned, Milton never returned a book late again.

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Can Only Be Given, Not Taken Or Bought

It may only be given,
Not taken or bought,
What the sinner desires,
But the saint does not.

Forgiveness.

Posted in Riddles

I Start Out The Same As Others

I start out the same as others,
Then grow to four legs and four arms,
And two hearts beat inside,
Until the separation.

What am I?

A pregnant woman is like other women, then the baby forms, and then is delivered.

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MT Rebus

MT

Empty.

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I’m A Sifter

I’m a sifter of a memorable shape,
You can eat a variety of me, but I can be toxic,
I can cause severe pain if you’re not careful,
And the action I describe could hurt as well.

What am I?

A kidney.

Kidneys filter your blood and are shaped like kidney beans, which you can eat. Red kidney beans contains high amounts of phytohemagglutinin (quite the word, eh?) and can be toxic if not soaked and boiled. Kidney stones can be extremely painful and if a kid knees you in the stones, that would also be unpleasant.

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I Change Stature As I Age

I change stature as I age, but my importance does not differ by age. My importance is manifested mostly when with my boss. When we part, I am of no importance.

What am I?

A pencil. It gets shorter with use, but is no less important. Its impact is from the person using the pencil to write or draw. Without them, the pencil is just an idle tool.

Thanks Keller!

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The Beggar’s Brother

A beggar’s brother went out to sea and drowned.
But the drowned man had no brother.
What was the relationship between the man who drowned and the beggar?

The beggar was his sister.

Posted in Brain Teasers

I Have Wings But Cannot Fly

I have wings but cannot fly.
I can do the twist but can’t move around.
People enjoy relaxing in my company.

What am I?

A ceiling fan.

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The Barber of Seville

The Barber of Seville shaves all men living in Seville.
No man living in Seville is allowed to shave himself.
The Barber of Seville lives in Seville.

Who shaves the Barber of Seville?

Nobody. The Barber of Seville is a woman. Female barbers are rare, but they exist.

And for more fun with barbers, check out the Barber paradox.

Posted in Brain Teasers

I Make Memories That Last a Lifetime

I make memories that last a lifetime,
Without me you’ll be miserable,
If you miss me you can gourge and it’s okay.
Some say I am naturally split in two.

What am I?

Sleep. It’s the time your mind organizes memories and knowledge. Sleep deprivation is miserable (as you well know if you’ve experienced it). If you miss a few nights of sleep, you can sleep more to catch up with no problems. And some believe that segmented sleep, where you sleep, wake for an hour, then go back to sleep, was the dominant form of sleep before the Industrial Revolution.

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