A comb. Other inanimate objects with teeth like a saw, zipper or a gear can “bite” you. Many people can affirm from painful experience in regards to zippers and saws, and the unfortunate factory worker who is missing a finger can attest to gears. It’s a rare event that anyone would be injured by a comb.
A man gets ready for bed at 9:45 pm. He makes himself a drink, then turns off the TV and the lights. The night was windy and there was a major storm. The next day he discovers he was the cause of seven deaths. How is this possible?
He lived in a lighthouse as lighthouse keeper. He turned off all the lights by accident, so a ship with 7 passengers couldn’t negotiate the rocky shores. One would think the light switches in a lighthouse would be more clearly marked.
A tailor can make a pair of pants from the scraps left over from sewing up five pairs of pants. If he has twenty-five scraps, how many pairs of pants can he make?
Six pairs of pants. He can make five initially, but once he’s done making five pairs of pants, he’ll have five remaining sets of scraps, meaning he can make an additional pair of pants, totaling six.
The typical answer to this is “I am,” but some argue that it’s not a complete sentence. However, if someone asked a man named Rupert if he was Rupert, he could reply, “I am” and it would make a complete sentence in my book.
But that’s not the whole answer. There is an even shorter sentence using an imperative with an implied subject (how’s that for an English terminology-filled sentence?) With “Go,” the “you” is implied. For example, if your wife wanted you to go with her to pick up some donuts and you were busy, she might say, “I really want to get some donuts, I’m starving!” and you might reply, “Go!” The implication being you never wanted to get donuts in the first place because you like ice cream more anyway and if you’re busy you’re probably doing something worthwhile and important and can’t be disturbed for such trivial matters as acquiring sweet pastries with holes in them, no matter how much of a waste of time your wife says your pursuits are. In short, “Go” is the shortest sentence in the English language that also has the longest implied meaning. Do you want to get get some ice cream? Go!
Ava pointed out in the comments that No is another viable alternative.
The thunder comes before the lightning,
And the lightning comes before the cloud,
The rain dries all the land it touches,
Wrapping the earth in a blood red shroud.
Alphabet (unfortunately there aren’t any actual dictionary words with every letter in the alphabet, so this gimmicky, somewhat unsatisfying answer has to suffice).
