I’m found on a hand and also a tree,
You’ll find me on Sunday, occasionally,
Records, pictures, islands and brew,
From August to Wolfgang and Sago for you.
Lucrezia Borgia invited a prospective victim to lunch. They ate a hearty meal of roast venison, with a selection of fresh vegetables, all washed down with the finest wine imported from Bordeaux, France.
After the meal, they ate figs and freshly picked grapes.
“Just one apple left”, said Lucrezia, “I insist you have it.
“No”, said the guest, “I couldn’t”.
“Tell you what”, said Lucrezia, “we’ll share it”, and promptly sliced the apple in two with her sharpest knife. The guest and Lucrezia started to eat their respective halves when the guest’s eyes rolled towards the ceiling and he fell over, dead.
“Another victim successfully dispatched,” thought Lucrezia.
A black dog is sleeping in the middle of a black road that has no streetlights and there is no moon. A car coming down the road with its lights off steers around the dog. How did the driver know the dog was there?