I’m Told and Make You Crazy
I can be told and can make you crazy,
Most people don’t like me and think I’m harmful.
What am I?
A lie. Lies are told, can make people crazy with rage, and most people don’t like to have lies told to them. Lies can’t be harmful though. :) (See what I did there?)
No Ears and More Than One Eye
I have no ears, but more than one eye,
Cut me in half, I won’t cry,
Leave me alone and I will die.
What am I?
A potato. The roots growing out of a potato are called eyes, when you cut a potato in half it doesn’t produce any moisture and if you leave a poor potato to its own devices, it will die.
Soft and Transparent
I am soft and transparent.
I am so small that I can sit on your finger.
I have no light but I help you to see the beautiful world.
What am I?
A contact lens.
A Woman Shoots Her Husband
A woman shoots her husband, then holds him under water for five minutes. Finally, she hangs him. Five minutes later they enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?
She took a photo of him and developed it in the dark room.
Horses, Sleep and Dreams
What do horses, sleep and dreams have in common?
Nightmares.
I Tell You When to Start
I tell you when to start,
Or remind if you forget.
I smash others to break them apart,
But I’m pushed by another of me.
What am I?
Cue. A cue tells you when to start, or if you forget your lines in a play. A cue ball is used to break at the beginning of a game of pool and the cue stick is used to push the cue ball on the break.
Another interesting tidbit is that cue is how you spell the letter q if you’re writing it out.
A One Letter Change
At my start I last a mere eleven days,
But change one letter and I’m over 31 years.
What am I?
One million seconds (about 11 1/2 days).
Change the “m” to a “b” to get one billion seconds (about 31.7 years).
It’s rather surprising that a million seconds and a billion seconds differ by such a large duration.
Whelming Rebus
What does this represent?
1 3 5 7 9 ----------- WHELMING
Overwhelming odds.