I torture children and parents
Many people scream and wail in my presence
Parents drag their kids to me
I am supposed to create smiles,
But often there is only a frown.
The Pope has it but he does not use it. Your father has it but your mother uses it. Nuns do not need it. Arnold Schwarzenneger has a big one, Michael J. Fox’s is quite small. What is it?
When the day before yesterday was referred to as the day after tomorrow, the day that was then called yesterday was as far away from the day we now call tomorrow as yesterday is from the day which we shall now be able to speak of last Monday as a week ago yesterday. What day is it?
The riddle refers to a variety of meanings of the word fine.
Feeling normal refers to when you feel fine.
Extremely thin refers to a fine thread.
A punishment refers to being charged a fee.
The one who wins refers to an athlete who is physically trained and hardened close to the limit of efficiency.
Free from impurity refers to measuring the fineness of precious metals.
A keen edge refers to a knife with a fine edge.
Refined refers to fine manners or elegance.
A slight inclination of the cranium is as adequate as a spasmodic movement of one optic to an equine quadruped utterly devoid of any visionary capacity.
Translate this rather strange sentence into one that is more sensible.